redwinelover's Journal, 04 November 2010

128 exactly this morning...good enough, I guess, for 15 days out from surgery. Yes, definitely getting better! Although today I had to shower and get dressed to go pick up a couple of prescriptions. First time I've driven. It went okay, but realized someone had driven my truck almost dry. Stopped at the gas station and ended up putting in 16.963 gallons of gas in a tank that holds 17 gallons including the "reserve". THAT would have sucked. Both kids in class, husband at work, one neighbor in CA right now, the other out at the ranch where she boards her horse, and the other friend probably watching her grandchild. A test? Is that what this is?? Anyway... tried on probably 10 pairs of jeans trying to find a pair that would button at the top. Still pretty swollen, apparently. Finally found a pair that almost fit and forced the zipper up. Probably not the wisest move, but I so did not want to go out in stretch pants again.

Okay, so last I wrote about the surgery, I was just going in. Or going under, however it was...so foggy. The next thing I remember I'm trying to talk to my husband. And I hear him talking and I hear my daughter talking and I'm trying to answer questions, but no sound is coming out of my mouth. I think the nurse told me it's okay, I probably won't have a voice for a while. I'm pretty sure all that was in the recovery room of the surgical center. Then I was transported to the recovery center itself...through the parking lot. I only have a slight, patchy memory of this... remember the really nice nurse of the morning (it was dark out now) and then someone else. Don't really recall the ride over, itself... I think I was on a gurney, but can't be positive. Then I'm in this bed and being propped up and pillows put all around and under my arms and my legs and the bed adjusted some. And then my husband and daughter again... I think the nice nurse from surgery... I'm pretty sure it was then, but she was telling me to make SURE I did NOT let anyone -even a nurse - pull me to an upright position using my arm(s). She said, do it the bear hug way and bent way down and had me reach around her neck and just hold on as she straightened up. Funny the stuff you remember. And they'd warned me that the drugs given with the anesthesia would cause amnesia, even for a day or two after and NOT to sign anything (lol)during that time. I kept trying to talk, but don't think I got any real words out. I felt okay then, sort of beaten up, but medicated. Nice cloud. Then I was out of it... don't remember if I was awake when visiting hours were over or not. Next thing I know, I'm awake and in PAIN. I mean PAIN! I don't know what to do...in this big room all alone, door pretty much closed. Can't remember if/where a call button is. Drugs definitely wearing off. Finally the nurse comes in and I'm trying to ask her for medication. She sits me up. Says it's time to walk - her and another nurse. I'm thinking...oh yeah, they told me I'd be up a couple of times that night. I'm trying to tell them pain, pain...I think it finally got out. They were like, Okay, lets get you up first. Yeah... GOOD thinking... so I'm up and the walk me straight into the bathroom. I'm looking at them like Why here? One of them tells me I'm supposed to pee. I said, I don't have to. Oh, well just sit her for a minute and we'll walk you back. So I do. And then I'm being walked (felt like dragged...did they NOT understand I was barely conscious??) and put back to bed. Tears now. The getting up and down really hurt like hell...especially on top of already being in pain. So I get a blissful dose of demerol (I think) and then a sharp poke in my shoulder. That was a blood thinner. Why couldn't it be put into the IV? Hmmm... I think by the sixth or seventh shot by day two, someone told me it had to be intramuscular... but don't know for sure. All I know is by the fifth shot in the same damn area on the same shoulder, even THAT was in pain. I'm out of it and then come too again and in pain. A nurse is coming in and I tell her I need something for pain. She told me she couldn't give me anything, it hadn't been four hours yet. Suddenly I'm pissed off and crying because of the pain and the "betrayal" by nice nurse of the surgical unit...the one that ASSURED me I would be "uncomfortable", but not in pain. That was a load of crap. I HURT. Pretty much from my neck to my knees. So I wait, sure the night nurse or her sidekick would come back at the appointed hour to give me some pain relief. Kind of doze in and out, wake up again when one of them walks in the room. I'm crying. She asks why I'm crying and I said I hurt. She looks at her watch and says, well, it's been five hours since you had any pain medication, I'll give you something. Comes back, gives me the shot and within a couple of minutes I'm out of it again. Next thing I know, it's light out (I can see it around the drawn shade) and everything on my body hurts. Two nurses come in... different from the night ones. These two are smiling and seem cheerful. Then one notices I'm hurting and comes over. She gives me something and after it takes affect, she says, we're going to switch you to Percocet. I'm really upset all of a sudden. I'm thinking, hell, the GOOD drugs knock me out and then I wake up in pain... that's why we paid the extra $650 for a second night... so I can be attended and have good drugs! They assure me that although the demerol is fast acting, the Percocet will give me a better and longer range of pain relief. I'm like, okay. I start to feel a little better. These two nurses are really nice. Ask me what I want for breakfast? I'm thinking... what? no menu to circle choices on? She says, Would you like some eggs, or cereal or oatmeal or some fruit, some toast, juice, coffee... tea? I'm thinking Wow, that's pretty cool. So I asked for some fruit and some oatmeal. She asks if I'd like some tea...they have some peppermint tea that she really likes. I said, sure, sounds great... a little honey? A bit later she walks in with this tray, beautifully laid out with cut up fruit and the oatmeal, I think some toast, a little carafe of the tea, and a little pumpkin floral arrangement. I hear very faint music in the background.. soft, soothing stuff. I took a couple of bits of the oatmeal and of the fruit and started on the tea and in walks my surgeon. So he's asking how I'm doing and at the moment, I WAS fairly comfortable. Being taken care of, medicated... life was good. So he wants to check things out and the nurse is holding this big mirror and he's checking out his handiwork. Opens the surgical bra and the compression garment, then has the nurse hold the mirror up. My first look at my new breasts! My EYES just about popped out. I mean, I had the steri strips on the nipples and all the incisions... but holy cow... I had a pair of BREASTS on my chest! And nice looking ones at that! At least, from what I could see. I was totally surprised by this. I mean, we'd discussed size and all and he told me that because of all my issues (skin condition, lack of elasticity...blah, blah, blah...etc. etc. etc) that he would not be comfortable going very large for me - saying I might need a lift again sooner, something about the amount of breast tissue to cover the implants or something. And I'd also opted for him to use Strattice with the lift/augmentation ... a "material" made from pig's skin with all the animal's cells removed or something. Anyway, they use this and it's human cadavier counterpart very often in reconstructive surgery. He'd offered it up, saying it wasn't "mandatory" in my case, it DOES add significantly to the overall cost... each sheet alone was something like $1500, plus it added an hour to the surgery time, which means an additional surgical fee (by the hour), additional hour of the OR, additional hour of anesthesia and the anesthesiologist and the surgical nurses... so it added something like 5 grand to the whole thing. At first I thought it was ridiculous, but even my husband thought we should go for it. His reasoning? It will probably last a lot longer and give me more of an internal lift. It acts as an internal bra, so it does make sense. And as a benefit, it would also allow me to go "slightly" larger than my surgeon originally wanted to go, so it was a good choice, in the long run. Originally I'd told him I was hoping for a full D, or what I thought might be a full D using pictures. And originally he said, No... how about a full C? After we decided on using the Strattice, that's when he said, well, knowing you want the Strattice, I will feel more comfortable trying a slightly larger implant... how about a compromise between the two and shows me two women's photos and said he'd aim to get me somewhere between the two. I agreed and laughingly said... aim on the HIGH side. So I wake up to these BREASTS on my chest and am just ecstatic! Exactly what I was hoping for! He could see my absolute joy all over my face when I saw myself in the mirror. And, being a plastic surgeon already proud of his work, looked very pleased by my reaction! Even the nurse there said, Wow, nice breasts! Of course, they're probably trained! lol... So pain? WHAT pain?! I had BREASTS... Oh, then he's showing my my belly. Okay, nice, but after boobs??? ha ha ha... He starts pulling the steri strips off my belly and has me take a peak... Does this bother you? I'm like, nah... I saw so many photos online over the months... pretty much what I expected it to look like. Now mind you, I do NOT have my contact lenses in, either...so for all I know, I'm a mess! But seriously, laying down from my own perspective, my tummy didn't look horrible. It was only standing up, with that lovely gravity that everything started to drape like a set of swag curtains. So the belly was nice, but I was just overwhelmed with my breasts. He'd also told me that the surgery had run 9 hours and he had to stop. He said that was on the way outer limits for elective surgery, and we HAD actually discussed this previously. We agreed that if he ran out of time, the area to skip would be the bit of lipo on the inner thighs. So, 9 hours of surgery and he wasn't able to get to that. But hey, I forgive him (I have BREASTS). Oh yeah, and he had told us prior to surgery that they always bill for two sheets of Strattice, because often it's necessary to use one on each side, but that he'd been successful at times getting both breasts done with one sheet. And if that was the case, we would be refunded the cost of one of the sheets... so that should be coming back and the cost of the lipo of the inner thighs will be refunded, too. At least, I don't think we are responsible for the additional half hour of surgical unit, nurses, anesthesiologist, surgeon, etc... We'll see. It'd be great to get 2 grand back though...save that for my NEXT surgery! LOL... He checked out my thighs, but again, swollen and won't be very impressive given all the issues. And he told me BECAUSE of all my "irregularities" in my legs, he had to go in really deep. To try to make them not look any worse. (AGAIN with the brutal honesty!) And he said, And what I found is you have some really grisly fat. I asked WHAT does that mean?? He said, usually when you lipo an area, the fat is nearly liquid and just sort of flows out. YOURS was this tough, grisly stuff that didn't flow and I had to really work to get it out. Lovely, huh? Someone ought to teach plastic surgeons a little tact! LOL... Again, I forgive him (I have BREASTS)... can you tell I'm loving my boobs?? :D Well, anyway, he wraps me back up and says it'll be up to six months before I probably reap the benefits of the lipo on the thighs... and that's when I learned he hadn't gotten to the inner thighs (damn that tough, grisly fat!). Or, I don't know...I may have known upon waking from surgery the night before but don't recall. Anyway, it was a good start to the day, just seeing some of the results sure helped me deal with some of the pain. More later or tomorrow..Oh yeah... weight of my new breasts: 1.9 lbs. So I guess I'm where I was pre-surgery?