kingkeld's Journal, 11 May 2012

I do not want to bicycle today. I've spent all morning negotiating with myself, finding reasons to not do it. I'm tired. My legs feel tired. I should go to work early. I'm plaintiff old lazy. I should be practicing the new songs...

I actually sat on the bike several times, then getting iff it again to do something else, until I saw how ridiculous I acted.

So here I am, journaling, from the bike. I'm proud to say that I convinced myself to do 30 minutes. I can do that.

Almost my entire work day will be a meeting, so it will be sitting down all day. Sitting down equals less burned calories. Sure, I've got band practice tonight, and I'll be playing my awesome bass standing up for hours, but I wouldn't feel right about my day if I was to not exercise and THEN sit down all dsynat work. Damn you, conscience!

I'm up in weight today. Dinner was heavy last night, and my evening dessert was jello, which weighs me down (had a large, but low calorie portion). I did eat Thursday afternoon cake at work, and I did have chocolate, but I stayed within RDI.

I think I did good.

I'm okay with the number on the scale, even if I'd rather see it lower, but it bugs me more that I don't "feel thin* today. I mentioned this feeling the other day, and it's such a great feeling. I love that feeling, and I want to feel like that again ASAP. This is important to me.

So, what's in store for today? Well, I switched office with a colleague yesterday afternoon, so I will be going in a little early to get better situated. Then at 9am i have an interview, at 10am i have a three hour meeting, and then I go home.

The meeting includes lunch. They're usually good about lunches but the order today will be sandwiches, and I'm not gonna play that game. Before I know it, it'll be 700 calories. I need mine for dinner and band snacks. That is, the breaking rehearsal always includes bread and cheese. I don't want to be without it, and the sandwich will blow my budget beyond what I'd like. So no sandwich for me. I know from experience that if I ask for a salad, then I'll end up with a pound of soggy pasta and a heavy dressing. So, I'll simply eat more leftovers from Wednesday's dinner, if it's possible. It might be ongoing meeting while eating, and then it's kind of hard sitting there with hot food, making everything smell like chicken. I'm considering buying a large protein bar, and let that be lunch, or simply wait for the meeting to be over and go for a chicken or tuna pita on the way home.

The downside to the protein bar idea is that I generally don't feel them satisfactory enough to qualify as a meal.

The downside to the pita is that I'll have to sit through everyone else eating, and I'll be starving when it's time to eat. I can't buy the pita ahead of time, as the stores won't open until after the meeting starts.

Anyways, I'm sure I'll work it out. I have fruit i csn eat if I get too hungry. Well see what happens. It's not like I'm gonna go hungry ALL day.

I do feel that I have more focus on doing good again. I regret the heavy foods yesterday, but it's on heavy food. Not high calorie. I would love to very soon spend an entire week under eighty kilos though.

...

Yesterday i had an interesting experience. As some of you know, I work with people who are on sick leave. I took over a client from a coworker, as the client needs to lose a LOT of weight. I promised to introduce her to my approach, as she can't live up to the demands from her nutritionist, who wants to put her on a 1200 calorie diet. The lady is close to 400 lbs, have had horrible eating habits for years and wants to change, but I firmly believe that going straight into a 1200 calorie cold turkey is just gonna set her up for failure.

I showed her the Danish Site similar to Fatsecret, and she loved the idea. She's off to a good start and she literally gave a sigh of relief when she realized that she was gonna do 2500 calories and not 1200. She left with a huge smile and tears in her eyes, and a look of hope, nothing like when she came in. What a treat my job can be on a day like that.

She mentioned that I should be doing THIS as my full time job. I've heard that quite some times by now. I'm starting to pay more attention to this. It'd be awesome to do for a living, but I'm not sure I have enough competence, coaching ability, business skills and everything else needed to make it a successful business. It's hard to make a business grow and thrive.

I know I can motivate. I know I can teach people to lose weight. I know it's be a less stressful job in many ways, but the pressure of owning my own company will probably be bigger than the freedom that comes with it.

I have a lot of thoughts on this. I'll write more about it one day when I'm journaling from my pc, it's a lot of typing, and many thoughts to put down so I'd need a proper keyboard.

I've now been on the bike for 42 minutes! I see, it's not that bad, KELD! as I see it pretty much every time, it's not doing the exercise that is hard. It's getting going, that is the real obstacle. Even now I'm considering stopping at 45 minutes, but of course the reasonable thing to do is go for the full hour. I'll simply keep biking, keep listening to music, and keep typing. Time passes so fast when I journal. I love it.

Having made the decision to go for the full hour puts the motivation back into it. I can feel that I don't look at the counter on the bike, and that I mentally relax to simply keep going. I have time to do this. I have the energy to do this. It will make me feel MUCH better about sitting down all day at work. It will make me feel that I'm working my way back to being under 80 kgs.

I know I've eaten a lot of heavy foods lately. It's not all been bad calorie choices, but the actual weight of the food has been high. I wonder how much this affects my daily weigh-in?

I'm not asking for an excuse to having gained weight? I'm simply wondering. How much will it impact my weight if I only eat light meals, but stuff them with nutrients and have a reasonable RDI. I'm not talking about starving myself. I'm thinking more in the lines of NOT consuming stews, no jello, things like that. Replace a meal with a bar?

I'm not sure I could actually pull this off, anyways. I'm not good with bars. They don't feel like a meal to me. I'm just simply thinking of shedding a few quick kilos to feel lighter and better, but not at the cost of feeling satisfied or even worse at the cost of health. I know better than that. It's an interesting question. Maybe I should experiment? :-)

I'll think about an approach. I'll let you guys know if I change anything and if I get different results from it. We need to learn something new every day, right?

Guess what. Bike says 57 minutes. I think it's time to start my thanksgiving list!

Today, I'm thankful for :
- Getting on the bike for a FULL HOUR after giving up three times. I gotta say this IS the major accomplishment of the day, no matter what else happens.
- jamming with The Black Peanut tonight.
- learning to new songs this week.
-early to work, early home, AND it's an easy day.

Happy Friday, people. Life is good!

179.2 lb Lost so far: 162.5 lb.    Still to go: 0 lb.    Diet followed reasonably well.

---

624 kcal

Fat: 14.59g | Prot: 58.45g | Carb: 67.93g.   Breakfast: Rye Bread (Reduced Calorie), Sliced Ham (Extra Lean), Egg. Lunch: Lettuce Salad with Assorted Vegetables. Dinner: Lettuce Salad with Assorted Vegetables, Tuna in Water (Canned), Pita Bread. Snacks/Other: Sliced Ham (Extra Lean). more...

3304 kcal

Activities & Exercise: Bicycling (slow) - 11/mph - 1 hour, Sitting - 4 hours, Standing - 1 hour, Sleeping - 8 hours, Music playing - 4 hours, Walking (moderate) - 3/mph - 30 minutes, Desk Work - 5 hours and 30 minutes. more...