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It's been a rough 24 hours. Been talking to my ex for a week or so now, holding out hope I could save our little family. That all came to an abrupt end last night when she told me, "I hate your guts. I hate everything about you. I don't want to be with you anymore. I hate you". Obviously it hurt to hear that, a lot. But I have decided I will not settle for being treated like crap simply because I want to keep my family together. I believe I will never have to deal with anything I am not capable of handling and while this may be a tough time right now, I will get over it.
Honestly though, it couldn't have happened at a better time. I see total change in my body, I feel and look good. I got in some exercise last night after she said that. Put up 100 pushups. I know it's not much but you've got to start somewhere. I know I'm going to do my 200 situps on the ball today, I am beginning to see definition in my abs and it's kind of freaking me out.
I'm just glad I didn't have to go through this emotional stuff when I was still fat and had bad eating habits. If anything this weight loss project has just proven to me that if I set my goals and do my best I can achieve whatever I need to. I need to apply that same approach to my work, my school, my son and when the time is right a new relationship.
I feel good today. I gave myself an hour to grieve but have stayed busy with school and have plans to go out with friends tonight. Everything that's worth something takes time and I need to allow myself time to get over this feeling of rejection but also realize that the prize at the end will be worth the pain.
Have a great day.
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152.2 lb
Lost so far: 14.8 lb.
Still to go: 2.2 lb.
Diet followed reasonably well.
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Diet Calendar Entries for 13 July 2014:
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1832 kcal
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Fat: 29.74g | Prot: 92.96g | Carb: 126.93g.
Lunch: Cape Cod 40% Reduced Fat Kettle Cooked Flash Baked Potato Chips, Boar's Head White American Cheese, Smart Balance Original Buttery Spread, Publix Premium Butter Crust Bread, Boar's Head Cajun Style Oven Roasted Smoked Breast of Turkey, Sliced Ham (Regular, Approx. 11% Fat). Dinner: Birds Eye Steamfresh Sweet Peas Singles, Publix Boneless Skinless Chicken Breast Cutlets. Snacks/Other: Anheuser-Busch Budweiser Beer, Anheuser-Busch Natural Light Beer. more...
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1848 kcal
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Activities & Exercise:
Sitting - 2 hours, Desk Work - 3 hours, Resting - 11 hours, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
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gaining 4.2 lb a week
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