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I am feeling pretty good all around. My weight seems to be doing alright, I think- the gain that I have seems to be steady and not too extreme which I am happy about. I think I'm supposed to gain about another ten pounds before Baby Tofu comes.
In a way I think women have it a little easier than men sometimes. If a woman gets pregnant, depending on her health prior to conception, she should gain about 20-30lbs over the gestation period, with about half of that weigh being put on in the latter third of the pregnancy. Gaining that much weight over less than a year is rather significant. A couple of years ago I actually wound up gaining more than that in the span of about 6 months- though that wasn't healthy at all, that was a complete abandon of self control and an personal trial I believe I was allowed to face to gain awareness of a deeper seated problem that I had with priorities and how I self medicated/ self soothed under stress. The frustrating thing I know most people realize about weight is that gaining is generally exponentially easier than losing weight.
However, one of the fascinating things to me about pregnancy is that it sort of defies the norm. The weight gain tends to be more gradual than the loss. The weight loss associated with pregnancy seems much more dramatic and instantaneous because giving birth doesn't just relieve the body of the ~7-10lbs of baby (based on average, healthy, full term birth weights), but that the female body also drops an additional 1-2 times that weight because of the adaptations made to accommodate that baby. (Added blood volume and water weight, increased uterine size, placenta and amniotic fluid, etc.,)
So it's kind of thrilling because it's a major investment that has this sort of euphoric vindication at the end. The trials on the body, the rapid, dynamic change that takes place before, during, and after delivery, etc. I get to see life produced and drawn out of me. It's incredible! And this is something that men are incapable of experiencing like this. (I do certainly do NOT mean to downplay the hard work/ energy and time investment related to pregnancy. It is definitely NOT a gimmick to jump start weight loss, it is an incredible blessing and burden; a gift of great value that women are privileged with. Not all women have enjoyable pregnancies. My heart goes out to friends and other women whose pregnancies either in part or overall really become a sacrifice and great labor of love because of the complications and discomforts/ trials experienced with them. I have been INCREDIBLY blessed to have mild pregnancies, but sometimes the experience is very, very different for other women. Yet it still amazes me how wondrous it is that this awesome experience is a unique gift and honor for women, because of that I sometimes feel sad for men who do not get to experience this. Though I know G-d has given men different gifts, honors and privileges that I cannot understand either because they do not extend to my sex,)
Perhaps ironically, two of the most amazing experiences I've ever had involved giving life and taking life. Sounds kind of dark and sociopathic when I say it like that, but having a natural childbirth with my daughter and then also the one time I went fishing at my father in law's pond- caught, killed, cleaned and cooked a blue gill by myself (but under direction) are two of the most rewarding, invigorating, empowering experiences I've ever had. (My husband is still amused and thinks it was cute how I was simultaneously eviscerating/ prepping and filleting the fish and yet screaming like a girl, "Eeewwww!", while I was doing it. :P) They made me feel strong, competent, beautiful, amazing, victorious, etc. Knowing that I accomplished those feats was so fulfilling because it demonstrated to myself that I could produce something of great value. I am looking forward now with great anticipation (and perhaps increasingly waning patience) to be able to experience that again. :-D
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