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Had a mental lapse and a bad day!!!! First of all I did not plan well for food today. I had to work the 11am-8pm shift and didn't plan and bring my foods today. Then someone brought my favorite cake and someone else brought donuts today...I broke down on my afternoon break. I am really not proud of myself but I had both. Of course they weren't nearly as good as I wanted them to be and on top of that I ate them anyway!
Ok so clearly I still have some emotional issues that I need to work on!
I have to stop this sabatage!!
I got noticed too much today and yesterday and that is one of the things that I wish I could get over. One of the reasons I started putting on weight in my 20's was self protection. People (mostly men but women too) don't notice you quite as much when you carry extra weight. I seem to start getting too much attention for my comfort zone as my weight goes down.
I have been doing some meditation specifically working with that and also using some other tools in my kit but every now and then I do this to myself in spite of myself. Anyway for all of my buddies, I know I will get past this it is just taking some time. I didn't gain all the weight over night and I am ok with it coming off as I can learn to handle it.
Diet Calendar Entry for 30 July 2010:
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2588 kcal
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Fat: 125.06g | Prot: 98.61g | Carb: 291.71g.
Lunch: Calorie Free Alfredo Sauce, Konjac Powder, GG Crispbread, Minced Garlic, diet grape juice, Cabbage, Apples, Cottage Cheese (Nonfat). Dinner: Tortilla Chips, Spinach (Chopped or Leaf, Frozen), egg white, egg. Snacks/Other: All Bran Crackers, Carb Well Bar, Almonds Braggs, Doughnuts (Plain), Spice Cake with Cream Cheese Icing. more...
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