TheUnhealthyDaddy's Journal, 12 December 2022

Damm your really having a rough few weeks 😕 hope things turn around soon  

OTB- Yep, I'm getting hit pretty hard. And I'm not a beast like you. IDK if I'll recover or just go finish out my days as TheUnhealthyDad. I'm close to throwing in the towel for sure. I wish you and everyone on here the best of luck on your journey.  

Well for what is worth I hope you stick around or take a break and come back. I dont think theres many communities out there as positive and supportive as this one. Life has a very not funny way of throwing everything at us at once I'm sure the light at the end of the tunnel will appear for you soon enough.  

Check if your employer offers a free plan for 1-2x your salary, no physical or background disclosure required. 

@Bananas, I'm in between jobs. This was actually through my wife's work. It was only $300k, same as hers, and there was no counter with a lesser amount. Just a big fat no. I had a $1M term life for under $50/mth 10 years ago and now I can't get anything? Damn that feels sh$tty. And now her work knows how unhealthy I am because HR saw we applied for it and didn't get approved.  

In the mean time, start your Life Insurance fund - Pay it to a bank account every month - add POD persons name. It will grow in time.  

Please keep in mind insurance companies are just a 'machine' out for profit. Sometimes it's just 'anyone' who's had this/that in a time period and hospital/medical charges have recently increased! Sometimes it's 'fill a quota' of this type of person and find a way to turn down "insert f'd up reason here" Please realize it's not you. I wish I knew how to help more than reminding you that we're short on sunlight and the darkness does make everything worse. It gets to me too. I'm going to be okay and you're going to be okay. hug your kids :-) 

There are options out there. Often your car insurance company will offer life insurance and many organizations like AARP. I don’t know what your job situation is but grab the life insurance as soon as you go back to work. As an older person I cx my life insurance because I no longer have young dependents, my house is paid for, I have no debt of any kind, I have paid for my final arrangements and have enough funds to tie up any loose ends after I die. As a nurse I have seen your scenario play out multiple times. One spouse is covering the whole family because it’s cheaper then something happens with that spouse and suddenly no one has insurance and if you have a pre existing medical condition it’s tough to get life insurance or medical insurance at a reasonable cost. 

Things pass after a while. Truly dig deep and hang in there. ❤️🙏🏻 

hang in there brother. ins companies are snakes. shop around with an agent and they'll find one.  

No worries man, live your life day by day and do the best you can for your body. There’s no point in worrying about tomorrow, you’ll just be wasting today 

I'm a retired nurse and while I was good enough to work 14 hour days I was not good enough to have health insurance. These people are buttholes.  

Supergainz1,. ❤️ Your post - well stated. 

@Supergainz, I am worried. I have a wife and 4 kids. I don't want to leave them debt like my dad did. My dad just started getting his SSI. If he had lived until 90, they would have paid over $400k over the years. And they will only help with a few hundred dollars for funeral expenses! Our system is BS. Cremation alone is $2k. Then we have to pay his storage unit for 1-2 years while going through probate. We aren't allowed to touch his personal belongings, mostly pictures, videos, and memories, nothing of value. This whole thing is a nightmare.  

I agree with Kenna. I would look into other options. My mortgage company offers insurance that would pay off the mortgage if I died. AARP is always sending offers with no health questions 

No real advice but sending lots of support!💜💜 

take the money you'd spend on the life insurance and set it aside or invest it while you're looking for options that will work for you. that will help build a nest egg which is the whole point of insurance. not a perfect solution, but something you can control for now.  

Oh my GOD— everyone needs a trust if you have a house, kids. Probate will suck the life and money out of you. Life insurance, bank accounts can have a beneficiary. Even if nothing else goes into a Trust, your house needs to. You can get the paperwork for a simple trust off the internet and do it yourself if a paralegal or lawyer is not a financial option. Even young people who share a home purchase need to deal with this. Basically, EVERYONE NEEDS to address these issues.  

I'm also uninsurable so I got guaranteed issue (acceptance) life insurance. They will issue without medical underwriting. I have two, $25k policies. They won't pay the death benefit for 2 years (except for accidents) but will return the premium plus interest during that waiting period if you die. I have policies with AAA and Mutual of Omaha. You might want to get premium pricing from: AAA, AARP, Mutual of Omaha, Colonial Penn and Gerber Life.  

@Kenna, I know. I'm learning about probate and the need for a trust right now. My wife and I will be setting everything up and try to talk her parents into it as well.