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A friend put this up on FB this morning— so funny, but true
Twas the month after Christmas,
and all through the house,
Nothing would fit me,
not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled,
the chocolate I'd taste
At the holiday parties
had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales
there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store
(less a walk than a lumber),
I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely reared,
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please."
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt...
I said to myself, as I only can,
"You can't spend a winter, disguised as a man!"
So, away with the last of the sour cream dip.
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
Till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie, not even a lick.
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie.
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore...
But isn't that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all, and to all a good diet.!
Diet Calendar Entries for 15 January 2022:
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492 kcal
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Fat: 17.19g | Prot: 19.39g | Carb: 65.26g.
Breakfast: Heritage beans, Trader Joe's Pumpkin Butter, Bacon, Unsalted Butter Stick, Dave's Killer Bread Thin-Sliced Good Seed Organic Bread, Egg, Morning coffee, Florida's Natural 100% Pure Florida Orange Juice, Grapefruit Juice. more...
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1459 kcal
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Activities & Exercise:
Walk 3 mph - 30 minutes, Resting - 15 hours and 30 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
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