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Yearofhealth2023's Journal

 
showing entries 11 to 15 of 465
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29 June 2024

Well distribution happened yesterday and they were nastier than even i thought they would be. What is wrong with people? Hubs cut them out of his life 2 years prior to MIL passing due to their ugly toxic behavior. They put his mom in such a terrible position saying they wanted reconciliation but how do you reconcile with a person who lies, manipulates, demeans and brings up things from over 20 years ago (hubs alcoholism in which he has been sober 23 years from) in order to just provoke pain. I dont understand. Yes, yes, this is not the forum for this post i get it it’s probably more of a journal for me to see what was happening in my/our life. Hubs came home upset, hurt again and angry. He kept calm and attempted to diffuse the mean things that were being said to him which probably infuriated one of them even more. It’s done. Estate distributed. Toxic people gone for now. They are his family so if he chooses to reconcile i will be civil as i have managed to for near 18 years but i think there is a special place for greedy, manipulative mean people and it is not in or lives. I know there is some jealousy over the great love between his dad and himself as there was jealousy over the relationship i had with their dad. One of them flat out told me so 9 years ago. Stupid. They could have worked on a better relationship but didnt. Just because one is related by blood does not a family always make. Big sigh here. He deserves so much better. It seems that we are the ones who have always picked up the freight when anyone in the family needed help but i am done as is he. Thank God.
Weigh-in: 136.0 lb lost so far: 91.0 lb still to go: 1.0 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (21 comments) losing 7.0 lb a week

28 June 2024

Had a bad day yesterday. Bought one of those smaller size lays bags (didnt they used to be 99 cents?) now 2.69. Should have been my first warning. Ate the whole bag and 1/2 bag of chocolate chips which are the only sugar item in the house (use in protein muffins). 2 protein bars (homemade good ingredients) and oatmeal with blueberries. Super unhealthy day and feel sick today. I knew what i was doing. My child is in a lot of emotional pain and i was taking to the airport where, once landed, more pain awaits and today is the estate distribution with some really disgusting people that have challenged my patience and ability to keep my thoughts to myself for years. (Hard to do when im not shy by any means but love of hubs prevailed) Been up since 3 am so 3 hours of sleep. So im sick from the sugar and fat and grease im not used to or the lack of sleep or both. Bad food behavior. At 60 for Pete’s sakes. So annoyed with myself. I have been giving myself 1-2 pieces of chocolate here and there and been fine but nope, cannot have in the house must only buy 1 small piece if thats where my stupid, sabotaging food brain wants to live. Damn. Bad food is not the answer. I KNOW this.
Weigh-in: 137.0 lb lost so far: 90.0 lb still to go: 2.0 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (15 comments) gaining 1.6 lb a week

22 June 2024

Weigh-in: 135.6 lb lost so far: 91.4 lb still to go: 0.6 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (12 comments) losing 19.6 lb a week

21 June 2024

Weigh-in: 138.4 lb lost so far: 88.6 lb still to go: 3.4 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (7 comments) gaining 1.8 lb a week

14 June 2024

Weigh-in: 136.6 lb lost so far: 90.4 lb still to go: 1.6 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (9 comments) losing 1.4 lb a week

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