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15 August 2024

Today is the final day of my first goal during this year, but I did not reach it. It was small and reasonable: losing 14 lbs since last spring but I only made it down 9 lbs. With my age (82) and sedentary life, it takes monumental effort to lose. In 22 weeks I have only had 1 glass of wine and 15 desserts. Now I will go on to my second goal for this year: October 28th, my Birthday but the pounds and number on the scale will need to be revised. When our beautiful daughter died of cancer I was at 117. If I can just stay on track I can get back there eventually even if it is only losing one pound a month, but that would take till Spring. On January 1, I will make a new goal. My goals are in increments: 120, then 117, then on from there. Five years ago I weighed 104, but with every pound down I get more wrinkly, so I don't know how low I want to go. A small frame at 5' tall might want to be about 100 to 108. When I used to be 5' 3 ¾” years ago I was 112. After losing almost 4” in height I would still love to be 112. There is a large wardrobe of clothes in the attic in size 4, but I may never be able to wear them. My figure has changed so much in the last 10 years. With the pain in my back, by evening each day, I become a bent-over dumpy old lady. Then by morning, I can stand up almost straight again. I'm so grateful for the many good things in my life.
Today is the anniversary of when we buried our 21 year-old son that was killed by a drunk driver.
Thank you, Lord, that I have lived this long, so I could get closer to You, and ask for forgiveness for the myriad of stupid, insensitive, and rebellious things I have done. You Lord are helping me live the life I am choosing. When it is Your time for me to change my life's direction, I know you will help me with that transition. Amen
Weigh-in: 125.2 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 12.2 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (12 comments) losing 0.2 lb a week

03 August 2024

Weigh-in: 125.6 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 12.6 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (2 comments) losing 0.5 lb a week

23 July 2024

Weigh-in: 126.4 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 13.4 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (1 comment) losing 0.5 lb a week

25 June 2024

My weight went down lower than this 2 weeks ago but then I went back up a couple of pounds. At this rate, I will never reach my goal of 14 pounds down by August 15th to be 120. My weight was 117 when our daughter passed away, and frankly, I was hoping to be back there by the end of October for my birthday. I have only had 1 glass of wine and 9 desserts/sweets in 15 weeks, and I do intermittent fasting 7 days a week. At this age (82) it's really tough to lose. Probably most people lose their vanity by this age. I've lost almost 4 inches in height (to 5') so I am lumpy. On the other hand, I am grateful to be mobile plus driving, to do my own grocery shopping, cooking, dishes, and laundry. There is no way my husband would let me have household help. Two weeks ago I pulled weeds for 6 1/2 hours in one day and I suffered with my back greatly for over a week. I am hanging on, coping with my abusive husband, and he has not hit me since August but can be pretty nasty. Adult protective services were out again to check up on me. I told them repeatedly "I want to be here". Sometimes I think I can cope okay, other times not so much. The Lord is being very gracious to me! I still color my hair (myself) and have acrylic nails. I have never had a pedicure but do my own and keep them tidy and freshly painted. I would just like to lose about 15 pounds in total. Each pound will help.
Weigh-in: 128.4 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 15.4 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (13 comments) losing 0.3 lb a week

04 June 2024

Since I haven't been journaling often it's past time to let a few of you know I'm still hanging in there. As usual, there is the good, bad, and ugly, like the movie. It's still hard for me to journal since my circumstances have not changed and if I am me, I garner criticism for not changing them myself. The good: I am trying to complete my goal of losing 14 pounds by August 15, along with Debbie Cousins, although my goal is very small compared with her. I am down 5 lb from the time I made the goal which isn't much but I have to diet in the extreme at my age and sedentary life of back and heart trouble. In 12 weeks I have only had 1 glass of wine, and only 8 desserts or sweets. I suppose having sugar once a week is acceptable to me. It's tough giving up bread and high carbs. My husband has not hit me in almost 10 months but continues to very slowly deteriorate physically and mentally. He isn't angry at me "every" day, but most. I haven't learned to not care when accused of negative intentions. I couldn't do this job without the Lord's help and grace.
Weigh-in: 129.4 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 16.4 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (13 comments) losing 0.1 lb a week

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