thiccmami's Journal, 12 September 2024

I’m so sorry you and your daughter are going through this and that is just unreal! My heart aches and the bully has to be hearing things like that at home for somewhere around them and how sad for a 2nd grader to learn that way of talking is ok🤬 

What????? Oh no. This hurts my heart. I’m soooo glad she told you. Be proactive Mermee. This kind of thing starts young. And you know what makes me sick? There’s even bullying on here amongst some. Disgusting. Six year olds have a lot to learn but grown women bullying??? That’s what’s the most sickening. 😤 Maybe some n here started when they were 6. Cruel world. Love on your little and reaffirm her. Give her a big hug. 🥰❤️🙏🏻 

So sorry that your beautiful little girl had to experience the cruelty that exists in the world so young. Your daughter's willingness to talk to you, about what happened to her is a wonderful testimony to your relationship! You are a wonderful mom! Just yesterday, I had to face that my beautiful 14 yo Granddaughter is starting to self harm. She too is being fat shamed. She texted me asking that I bring a bandage to her at school. She first told me she had fallen and injured her arm. When I challenged her, she went to the councilor and admitted what she was happening. We luckily are early on in the situation and she is willing to talk to her family. Mom is office Mgr for mental health providers. We are a close family and will support her. Resources are there, thankfully! Unfortunately kids are learning that it's OK to be mean at even younger ages. Look at how adults behave on the political stage. It's embarrassing that people in powerful positions are teaching our young people that personal attacks and name calling are acceptable behavior. Hugs for you and the little people!  

Chances are, those are the same words the bully hears at home, and that’s a tragedy in itself. That said, it’s not okay, and you need to provide the best love and support you can. It sounds like you’re doing a fantastic job already, you just have some new complications. I’m going to advocate for martial arts at her tender age to instill confidence, discipline, and the secret ability to kick ass should the actual need arrive. 

Your child doesn't look fat. Fat is not a moral issue. Being fat means you are more likely to survive a zombie apocalypse, famine, etc etc etc. It's not morally wrong, so it doesn't have to trigger guilt if you unpack it with the child. My daughter was hella chonky and the skinny vegan kid down the road used to bully her. I just said 'she's hangry because she's only allowed carrot sandwiches.'. LOL. It woudl be a fun exercising asking your daughter who was the fattest there. Often, it'll be a fatter person teasing a thinner person. They know these words hurt, they don't have to be true, they just have to hurt. Unpack it. Why is this girl calling her names at all? does she have a really bad home life? What's the cultural norm in your society? "hey fat b!tch" is probably a term of endearment here in some parts of New Zealand. So is 'awww, ya cvnt'. How much emotion you inject into this is how seriously your daughter will take it. If she doesn't care, it won't hurt her. ---------------------------------------------------------------- (heh making a new paragraph here). ---------------- on another note, at the supportive accommodation house I work at, last night, M--- was furious and upset. he was calling everyone b@stard and suchlike, slamming doors, having a giant paddy. Why? Because someone at day base called him a b@stard. Well, if I were to unpack it (once the door slamming ended or I might lsoe a finger) I'd be asking which world he wants to live in. The world where everyone is allowed to call everyone b@stard, or nobody calls anyone a b@stard. And then, I'd ask - which world is possible. Either everyone gets hella screwed up when they're called that, and never calls anyone that - or everyone just laughs and calls them one right back. Honestly. In the 'bully's' world, 'fat bitch' is probably fine. In your world it's a highly emotive buzzword. When preparing our children for reality, we need to not heighten their sense of being wronged in such a way that they will always be getting wronged. That's called rescuing. Look up 'drama triangle'. :)  

Bullying is a sign that the young bully is or has been bullied. Watching parents do it to each other is abuse in itself. It is no excuse for doing it, but it does help us understand where it comes from. Hugs to your darling girl. I hope the other child also gets the help they need. It is a sad situation. 

I was bullied at 5 years old. The rich girls said my hair was ugly and I couldn’t sit at their table in kindergarten. People are never to young or too old to be mean unfortunately. 

💙 If she knows and feels your love, and she hears you consistently reminding her of her own beautiful ways, the hurtful words will fade quickly into the background and be forgotten. 

Agree with what Katsolo said, kids hear that junk at home from adults and it’s very sad that this is true in the society we live in today, it’s not just by adults it’s being said in tv shows and in movies. My thought is go to the school she attends and just calmly let the principle know what is going on and let them handle it; and take Katsolo’s advice 

I'm sorry. I was bullied around that age and it still lingers in my heart. I hope she is stronger than I was.  

I’m am sorry this happen to her, how awful. Maybe transfer to a charter school, they are no tuition and typically better standards. 

so sad 

So sorry for your little girl and you. Heartbreaking and infuriating how kids are being raised. Go to the school inist they deal with this proactively. 

your daughter is a very innocent & beautiful little angel . it saddens me how someone can be so cruel. i myself was bullied as a kid growing up in the 70's. I know times have changed dramatically & school authorities should be made aware of their obligations to provide & protect children in their school environment. i advise this matter be brought to the attention of the principles office. I will keep her in my prayers 🙏  

Wow! This is makes me sad & mad that mean people suck & can so cruel to children at such a young age. Your daughter is not fat she's precious & a cutie. Those mean girls learned to be cruel by their parent's examples and should be ashamed of themselves. I'm guessing those girl's parents are a-holes too. Unfortunately those girls will be just as mean when they get older...bitter & cold hearted. Just like everyone else's comments, talk to the school. If the schools don't take it seriously escalate it to whomever. Fight on girl! You're a great mommy! Hugs to ya both. Let's us know what happens next I pray you get this resolved quickly.  

Wow that is scary that this goes on at such a young age, i have seen bullying horror stories on the news. Prayers to your family🙏🙏🙏🙏 

I’m not shocked at all. I was called ugly, poisonous, disgusting, h**, and only worthy of a BJ when I was 7 years old …. by boys… and this bullying continued all the way till end of higjschool. My advice to you, have a talk with them kids and put them in their place before this goes out of hand. 

I'm sorry that happened to her. Some people shouldn't be parents. That is a learned behavior for sure, 

she's beautiful. I'm sorry that happened to her. That child is hearing that in their household. I would go to the school, because it will continue if something isn't done 

💙In a way, it is an opportunity. All any of us are doing is taking life events and assigning meaning to them. You have an opportunity to demonstrate, through to her that although others say things that are hurtful, although it seems as though Life hurts you, it is your meaning that matters and your meaning alone. Show her that the words are not true. Thoughts about life can seem painful, but she is inherently loveable. Then her meaning of this will be, my mom loves me, which eventually will become I am loveable. Promise.