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Sorry to talk about this again, but finding out after 8 years of marriage that my mil doesn't like me, seems to be effecting me more then I thought.. His family isn't as loving and happy as most other families (though my husband is very loving and happy), but either way, I knew she didn't love me, but I thought she at least liked me. We talked, she watched my kids, we shared interests.. I thought she was a great mil, but I'm starting to see that now I have the aim of her hate.. She is always mad at someone, but I find now that my anxiety is horrible when ever she's even mentioned.. She had tried to turn my husband, in laws, even my own mother against me (with no success,) but I find myself hurt and frankly angry. I want to communicate my feelings to her.. But we haven't seen her in about 2 months now.. (my husband told her that we are a package and if she wants to see him or my kids she has to be nice to me).. But I feel like where is my 2 sense in this? My husband has asked me to stay out of it and it is his mom, not mine so I am trying to respect his wishes.. But I mean come on.. When do I get to stand up and say "bitch listen here......" haha, I wouldn't say that, but still.. I just don't know, she's affecting my anxiety, she's making me feel anger towards her, which I don't want.. And she's trying to put a wedge between my husband and I. She is just a horrible person and I needed to vent before I explode... 🤯.. Thank you for listening.. Sorry again for the rant
Diet Calendar Entry for 09 July 2019:
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1098 kcal
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Fat: 57.20g | Prot: 97.51g | Carb: 66.84g.
Breakfast: Aunt Millie's 35 Calorie Honey Wheat Bread, McDonald's Egg McMuffin (No Muffin). Lunch: Quest Birthday Cake Protein Bar, Chicken Breast. Dinner: Plain Waffle, Hormel Spam Classic, Egg. more...
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1 to 20 of 21
 Comments
Sorry I meant to say our kids, not my kids..
09 Jul 19 by member: Sakiewicz
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Care about yourself, your husband, your kids. In that order. Skip the witch 🧙♀️
09 Jul 19 by member: velvetee
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She sounds like a miserable person and I don't imagine anything you can say to her will change her. Take care of yourself. Don't make your husband chose sides. Other people will see her for what she is; rise above it.
09 Jul 19 by member: FullaBella
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On the good side, through all this I'm getting to know my sisters and brothers in law better.. They have been very supportive
09 Jul 19 by member: Sakiewicz
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Be assertive, but not aggressive and remember, it's not your business what other people think of you. It's all perception, anyway, be extra nice to her when she's a flaming twerp, it will confuse her.
09 Jul 19 by member: @philrmcknight
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some people are just unhappy. limit your time with her as best you can and always watch what you say. it's probably more about her than you (inner loathing), but she focuses outward.
09 Jul 19 by member: Katsolo
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Don’t ever apologize for journaling on here! We love reading journals that have to do with inner thoughts.
09 Jul 19 by member: KayBuckaroo
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Write her a letter. You probably think I'll say don't mail it but I say do mail it. Of course I have little tolerance for assholes so you may not want to take my advice. 😁
09 Jul 19 by member: davidsprincess
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Has she ever expressed why she doesn't like you?
09 Jul 19 by member: AdaOke
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There will always be something in our lives that can add to our stress levels. Don’t give up your power to her and let her ultimately win. Begin to tell yourself what you know to be true about yourself and hold that in your heart, unwavering. Do for yourself what she is not doing. Encourage yourself, talk gently, accept that others aren’t following the path of being kind and that it’s their business, nothing to do with you! If your emotions aren’t easily soothed, then meditate if you don’t already, breathe. Focus on you and how you feel and take back your power! You are beautiful and wonderful! That’s it. It shouldn’t matter to us if people think otherwise but it takes practice. You got this! The more we take back our inner power the more we inspire others to do the same and we can truly change our lives, and change the world! You are already doing well by understanding what is bothering you, knowing what you want, and finding a way to express yourself even though other avenues of expression don’t seem open right now. You’re doing well and you will only get stronger and more sure of yourself. As we all will if we keep moving slowly but surely in the directions WE choose! Best of luck! ☀️🌟🌸💞 Thanks for sharing and trusting our community with your feelings. I hope you feel support from the responses. We are behind you!
09 Jul 19 by member: Jewellynn
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I had mil difficulties too. Made my life miserable for as long as I gave her control over me. You are fortunate that your husband sees your point of view.
09 Jul 19 by member: Sarah1950
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If it helps to talk about it. I'm all ears. I'm glad I'm single.
09 Jul 19 by member: Muttyb
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Perhaps your husband is more loving and happy than his family because of you! And perhaps mil is jealous ... well, she can suck it! You do you and you will be fine. 😊
09 Jul 19 by member: Joleen2012
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Keep your mate close and don’t sweat the details , be strong in your marriage and this will pass .
09 Jul 19 by member: Tracker8591
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Thank you everyone for the love and support.. It's been a hard couple days.. But I'm glad I talked about it.. It almost feels like high school again in a way.. The reason she says she doesn't like me is because of how I parent my kids, she wants no rules and grandma's house, and I told her kids need rules everywhere. There's no such thing at no rules with young kids. I put them in time outs, I've smacked their butts, and I take them aside and talk to them sometimes about what they are doing wrong and how I expect them to act. I parent as calm a and not aggressive as I can because I had very aggressive parents. I am told by everyone that I am a great mom, my kids behave great.. But she thinks that they should have no rules, and that is what started this. 🤦♂️ I am.very confident in my ability to parents, my kids are smart, kind, and they don't act horrible in public. That's rules... Oh well, just wanted to say thank you for all the help, you guys are so awesome
10 Jul 19 by member: Sakiewicz
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It's great that your husband is taking your side. You may have to emotionally divorce your MIL, deal with her on a strictly factual basis.
10 Jul 19 by member: gz9gjg
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praying for you! you sound like a caring, thoughtful person--you will thrive! Ive found that my growing relationship with God has been life-changing. Everything in this world will change; God and His love for us will never change. cheers!
10 Jul 19 by member: JohnnyMiller13
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I had a mother in law who did not love me, or even like me. We got along but there was no warmth or love. When I divorced her son after 29 1/2 years of marriage, she said to one of his siblings "well, I always wondered about HER!" She successful raised 9 alcoholics. How I parented was one of her issues. From my experience, I can tell you that nothing you do will ever be recognized as right. Never expect affirmation, praise, or recognition from her. Do what you know is best for your family, include her where you need to, but ignore her hurtful comments and actions. Lay down the law when you need to. My children are grown with families of their own. They love their grandma, but also describe her as "to mean to die"..... Good luck, and don't let her get you down!
10 Jul 19 by member: Jewelry Mavin
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We understand, one thing for sure, listen to your husband, let him deal with his mother, you let got of her, and give her over to God, and don't let her cause you any anxiety, one thing I've learned was to put my faith in God, and not people (meaning please God), Love people with the love of God (spiritual), and I fell in love with Jesus and that was the best thing I ever done, have a wonderful blessed day, stay encourage uplifted prayerful thankful happy in Jesus, and watchful always, love always. (show Jesus love always).
10 Jul 19 by member: Retta Smith
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I wish I could give all of you guys hugs, it feels so good to have my feelings heard.. Thank you so much everyone
10 Jul 19 by member: Sakiewicz
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