sarbobar's Journal, 09 April 2008

Let me tell you about my fiancee! I was always a decent eater but he's a police officer so he would have a lot of takeout and junk food! I decided that I wanted to go on the South Beach diet to lose a couple of pounds and he acted really supportive. Then we went grocery shopping and he started to pick out "bad" food and unhealthy food while I was picking up the "good" food. When we got home I asked if he would store all of his crappy food on the highest shelf (which was honestly a foot or two above me and I literally would have to climb on the counter to get to it). He did and then began to forget that it was up there and started to eat my good food. We then would go grocery shopping and I would have a shopping list of what food we were going to eat that week (I don't think he minded eating whatever I wanted because I was the one making it). He would occasionally get his chips and salsa but instead of eating that I would eat cottage cheese and salsa (it really is good but sounds disgusting) and when he got pizza, I would buy the lean cuisine pizza things. He then gradually started to eat my healthy foods and now he is a bigger health nut than I am! I would give it a try and do the cooking for awhile and make out lists. You still have to have the will to refuse it, but just think about how much work you do to lose weight and whether it really is worth eating those nachos and cheese or if you could substitute it for something else (I really like homemade salsa and guacamole with wheat thins and I measure it out and put it all on a plate so I don't overdo it!) Hopefully this helps! Good luck! 

Sarah, its cool. I had GERD whenever I was really obese...if you read my profile I was 267 lbs and the ENT told me that I needed to "back away from the table a little quicker" boy that pissed me off. But you know what? Looking back, that was SOOO true. I also have to admit that sexually, it took a toll on my body....so I totally feel you. I know this is TMI but I have never felt better about myself and I absolutely LOVE sex and the intimacy we share now that I have started to lose weight. I honestly think though that its a hormone change more than anything. I have been in your shoes...in fact, if you look back, I started trying to lose weight in like October and the motivation was there, I swear it was, but it was like your chips and salsa and cinnamon rolls etc. I kept caving. Losing weight with other people around is probably the hardest physical and mental thing to endure. I know thats tough to take in. If he's not willing to change himself, you cant do it either and thats probably causing a lot of stress on you. I know how hard all of this can be. I'm a stay at home mom and I love chicken nuggets. Guess what my 2 yr old gets for lunch practically EVERY day?! Yep, you guessed it...Chicken nuggets...cheap and easy and he loves them. ALL 3 of my boys, My 23 y.o (husband), my 7 yr old and my 2 yr old eat all day long, no lie. None of us eat a sit down meal besides the boys at dinner because of my husbands schedule. I eat when the boys do but I dont eat with them :( which is my bad....I eat right beside the table here at the computer because its the only time I get besides when they are in bed. For instance, tonight, I felt really blah and I made the boys chicken nuggets and mac and cheese (yes, I know, what a combo, right?) I had spinach....my husband, he came down an hour or so later and had taquitos and a quesadilla. Is that fair? WELL HELL NO! Do I think he cooks that smell good shit to rub in my face? Well, yeah. :D But guess what...Something tells me to think about what I'm going to see whenever I lose weight. A couple things...on the eating out. I dont know just how often yall eat out but a few things to think about on that...#1, the price of food is ridiculous...its too high to eat out. #2 thing, you need to check out somewhere like sonicdrivein.com or jackinthebox.com...places that you might eat fast food that has a nutrition facts thing on their website. You would be suprised at the calories practically ANYTHING you get on their menu has, including salads. We go out to eat every friday or so and I take it easy on what I eat. I believe that cutting that out has helped me a lot. In fact...I've gotten strong enough that if the boys want mcd's i'll take them and will drink a diet coke while they do their thing and I'll eat when ever I get home. Another tip on eating at home that I have started to do. If I'm cooking something that I know I love to eat...such as say, spaghetti. I always heat up can of progresso 0 point (weight watchers), 60 calorie per serving, soups or I'll get some spinach or just something that is low calorie and I SLOWLY eat on it while I'm cooking. And once dinner is done, if theres any left, I set down and eat the rest of it. LOTS AND LOTS of water also. OMG, no lie, it helps. And, if youre not already, try taking 1 a day weigh smart...or the walmart brand. I promise you, those things help. They are multivitamin and I believe they have guarana or SOMETHING, lord help me, I cannot remember what...in them. I do hope that you can figure things out because I know how hard it can be. Something WILL snap one day and you'll jump on train and kick butt with it. 

Oh, hun.... That's really hard. Do you know of and/or like Dr. Phil? He's got a really good book... something like the Ultimate Weight Loss something.. It's a really, really good book! What you should do is clean house and don't let crap into your house. I know that's harder for you to do then it is for me to say. But, I did it for myself. My hubby likes stuff that I don't really care for sometimes, so I'm lucky. Anyway... tell him it's not coming in the house. It's hard that he hasn't made the decision to be a partner w/ you in this, to care about his own health as well as yours:-( I'm sorry. One thing I always think of is that someday I'll want kids and I want to be alive to see them grow.. and before that, to keep up to them when they're two years old. I'm not going to do well at that at 230 lbs! Is there anything I can do for you? It'd be fun to talk sometime w/ you:-) Do you have AOL IM?? I'll keep you guys in my prayers! With love....  

Thank you all so much for your advice. I'm seriously going to follow it. You guys are all so great. What an encouragement!! THANK YOU!!!