gotta lose it

I am 55 years old and have 3 children and one foster son. My children are 11, 4, 3 and 3. I work part time right now and am looking for a full time job. My husband is presently in Police Academy and will be
graduating in May. I am praying that he has a job by June 1. I love my children and have focused my life around them. Which in turn I have let myself go, I have become last on my list. We also have my step daughter and her husband living with us, they have recently moved from Okla to Fla and are staying with us til they find a place. They have a 15 month old and she is going to have another son on the 3rd of April.

I have been heavy and overweight the majority of my life. I had a period of time in my twenties when I lost 35 lbs and kept it off for
about 3 years. I have very little willpower and my discipline lacks alot too. My support team is helpful in the beginning and then it slacks off after awhile and then I become weak. I really need a good
support team and people to turn to when the family is not in their helpful mood.

I REALLY want to lose this weight that I am carrying now, it is causing my arthritis, asthma and diabetes to act up and I feel CRUMMY all the
time. I wake up feeling sick and the same going to bed at night. I have no energy. I think this bio has turned into a confession. Thanks for letting me confess. I look forward to my time I can spend with all of you and pray for a new me