No Cheating No Hiding Challenge III

At a very young age I was taught to eat everything on my plate, because someone in (insert 3rd world country) is starving. That sentiment was fine when I was a child and had an abundance of energy and calories meant nothing. However, I still feel that way to this day.

Whenever I order out, I feel like I have to finish everything on my plate. If I go over to someone's house for dinner I feel obligated to clean my plate. Even if someone gives me a basket filled with unopened chocolate, I feel like I can’t give it away or throw it away, because it was picked out for me… (I think I’m noticing that a lot of my decisions seem to be guilt driven… lol )

I still struggle with it today, but I found that when I am at home using smaller plates helps me choose smaller portion sizes, which in turn helps me eat less!

When I bought a set of dinnerware it came with bowls, mugs, dinner plates, and dessert plates. At first I used the dinner plates, because… well… it said dinner plates! Then one day I just decided to use the dessert plates for dinner and keep the “dinner plates” hidden. (I think it was because they were easier to clean. ) It’s worked pretty well for me so far. I actually pulled out a dinner plate to grate some carrots on and holy-moly it is huge compared to the dessert plates I am so used to!

Does anyone here have any psychological challenges they’ve had to overcome, or need help overcoming, that they would like to share?

I was also raised with the whole "clean your plate" philosophy and suffered some pretty unwarranted punishments when I failed to do so.

I have gotten much better about choosing smaller portion sizes to compensate. IF I eat out, I will often order just a sandwich, without the sides, or just a salad, with no bread. This helps me satisfy both my need to lose weight and the psychological need so ingrained in me that it sometimes hurts to throw food away.

Oh boy! You are talking about my life. My Mom was the clean plate lady too. I get the whole starving in ??? thing!!!! And worst off when she would buy cookies, candy, cakes, ice cream etc and have them in the house (all the time) she would put a blind eye to the fact that a bag of Oreos would be gone in one day. HELLLOOO! Your daughter has an eating problem don't buy the cookies!!!! But she thought it was better to say "Now honey you can only one cookie at a time!" and proceed to put me on diets starting at 10 years old to loose weight.

Yea, I get it she did not have nearly the resources we have today. She did not have the knowledge that we have of dieting today and worst off the doctors were telling her to do this!!!!

She lives with us today and unfortunately she still has that same attitude even with the the information that is available. She does not really believe that there is such a thing as eating disorder. Even with her knowledge of me using laxatives and a short stint of vomiting and starvation dieting all through high school and even some into Jr. High and more so through college.

When she asks for me to buy her cookies (again she lives with us), I always ask her to keep them in her room. Her response is "Well, the kids will need some too!" No mom, my kids do not need them at all! Keep them in your room! She finally does now, but it took 3 years for me to make her understand that if I see it I will eat it and that there is NO nutritional value for my kids!

Today, I am still an emotional eater and I keep my house CLEAN of candy, cookies, ice creams etc. 90% of the time because of my childhood. I still have the same problems with cleaning my plate like you do. We eat out about 2X a week and I try to keep to the smaller portions, but it is hard. That is one of the reasons we stopped eating out as much as we use to. We use to eat out about 4-5X a week. (That's between lunches and dinners)

Since I have become a vegetarian, it is actually much easier to eat smaller portions because I feel fuller sooner, which is a new sensation for me. But I still struggle. Put French Fries in front of me and I can not "Waste" food, like I was taught not to waste food!

What to do? Pray! Struggle! Pray some more! One thing I do when we go to a more of a sit down (not fast food) restaurant is to ask for the box as soon as the food comes and box up a portion before I even start eating. It works most of the time for me.

What do you all do to help get your through you psychological eating problems?

Oops, sorry that was soooooo long!

Thanks for sharing!! It's good to know that I am not the only one with this problem! I actually just went to visit my parents this past weekend, and they are still pulling the "clean your plate" talk. I tried suggesting they save a portion for lunch or even as a snack later that evening, but they were like no, it's fresh now and it won't taste as good and blah, blah, blah. lol Some things never change!

Well done Bluebox...The only person we can change is ourselves.

Carry on mate

I have trouble when eating out as well so one thing I've started doing is asking for a to-go box when my food arrives. Then, I immediately put 1/3 to 1/2 of my plate in the box and put it aside. Then, I don't have to feel guilty about cleaning my plate--and I have lunch tomorrow all ready to go. If I leave it all on the plate, I just keep eating until it's all gone.

Like many of you, I work on resisting temptation by avoiding it--I don't buy cookies, chips, whatever--if it's not in the house, I can't eat it, right? LOL However, if I find I am really craving something, I do allow myself to go to the store to buy it. I figure if I want it badly enough to get out of the house and head the store, I can have it--plus, I burn a few extra calories running out to get my craving. This also helps me keep from feeling deprived--knowing any time I want a certain food, I will "allow" myself to have it. I just have to work a little for it.

I know it costs, but I started buying paper plates. You know, those things don't hold quite as much as my dinner plates, and I don't put myself in as much pain cleaning up afterwards now, so I have more energy to try to get a little exercise. I've been really proud of myself, for the most part I've handled cravings by simply telling myself that if I eat that, I'll put my goals further behind. I know it's not that easy with an eating disorder but I've been blessed to not have that problem.

I have a teenage son that works and he keeps junk food in the house because he's 5'10 and 140 lbs so he can eat all that stuff that he wants, and because of sports, doesn't worry about gaining too much weight.

If I'm really craving something special, I've gone out of my way to find better choices for the same thing that will fit into my meal plan. For example, Breyer's makes a wonderful carb smart ice cream. Just a little bit and I'm good to go for a while. I haven't touched a soda or potato in 4 months. (I used to drink nothing but Dr. Pepper and carb laden foods with high glycemic index were the basis of every meal).

I have never bought cookies, candies (except sugar free), chips and that sort of thing on a regular basis, it was usually a once a month treat if the kids had earned it. My son, on the other hand, likes his snacks handy. I have one cabinet in the kitchen that I stay out of, that's where he's allowed to keep his junk food and nowhere else. Between that and simply keeping my goals in mind, I'm slowly but surely getting where I want to be.

My eating out plan is that I check the website for wherever I plan to go. I pick something that fits in my meal plan and add it to my food diary to see how it will add up for my daily totals, then when I get to the restaurant, I order only what I budgeted in my food diary.

You are doing awesome! Great job losing 45 lbs!

One of my biggest challenges is the fact that I don't like waste. So, if I order something, healthy or not, and feel full with only a few bites left, I would finish those bites. That leads to over stuffing myself. So instead of binning the leftover food, I end up using myself as the bin.

Similarly, if something might go bad in a day or two if it continues being stored, I finish that off too. Only, now I try and build that into my meal plan and even try and make it healthier.

Another challenge I face is that I don't sleep if I'm doing something interesting. Being a night owl is second nature to me. The result is lethargy, excessive hunger, lack of concentration, and weight gain. I'm still grappling with these.

Asking for a to-go box when food arrives, that is pretty brilliant. Do you get any weird looks for doing that?

I usually order takeaways. But yes, in the more posh places, if I ask the leftovers to be packed away, I do get weird looks. But then, the staff is too polite to say anything and I ignore those looks.

No idea how it is for the others though.

If I start doing it, ambtreh, I'll be prepared for the weird looks and ignore them.