Rob.c.weiss's Journal, 31 March 2014

<h3>Getting "Real"</h3>
I just gave a tip to my good friend, TIC, here on FS. And I thought I'd add a quick journal entry about it. It was about "being realistic" in our diet and expectations.

<h3>Being "Rock Solid"</h3>
The biggest thing that got in the way in my past attempts at weight loss was when I would try to ignore my natural impulses, and be *rock-solid* in my approach, whatever it was at the time. Inevitably, what with being human and all that, I would have a bad day or two, and beat myself up about it. That, of course, led to a certain depression, which in turn led to a growing certainty in my own failure. A severe fatalism would kick-in, knowing the whole thing was pointless. And that was the end of that. No more control. No more weight loss.

The endless cycle.

<h3>We are Human</h3>
Ok. I know it has been kicked to death, but it really is the single-greatest truth that we all have to come to terms with if we want to be successful in this, and probably any other endeavor in our lives, as well. We simply cannot forget that we are human, that we have programming built into us that is very low-level and was built-in to keep us alive. More than that, we have an entire emotional psychology to go along with it. All of our past experiences, good bad and ugly, feed into this. We simply cannot attempt to ignore it, or override it.

<h3>The Success Stories</h3>
There are so many great success stories here on FatSecret, not the least of which are our good friends, KingKeld, NorthernMusician, TXSnowman, and (you may kill me for adding you here, Bill, but I think you're it too) DragList. And I've read journals from a number of others on here too. And through all their varying approaches at success (intermittent fasting, ketogenics, Atkins, VLCD, High-carb / low fat, a more traditional diet, or even weight watcher's points) the one common thread that made the difference for all of them was a component of realism to their own expectations. Bill builds it right into his approach. In fact, in some form, I believe they all did, and continue to.

<h3>Challenge Yourself</h3>
Without a doubt, this does not mean we should not challenge ourselves. Of course, without that there would be no weight loss at all. But within any structure of challenge we determine we want to put in place for ourselves, we have to keep in mind that most essential piece : how does this allow me my human urges? How will I cope with an occasional "cheat"? Does this structure, the way I plan to use it, allow for me to be myself when I need to, and does it provide a means for getting me "back on track"?

If we have not built these into our plan, we may very well be setting ourselves up for failure at the very beginning.

<h3>When things changed for me</h3>
Things finally changed for me when I began to understand this, and formulate plans for how I would handle these things. I have to admit, I didn't do it quite so forthrightly as all that. To be honest, I didn't even realize I was doing it. It was just something I started adding in to kind of *let off steam*. But what a difference it has made for me this time. At first, I had my challenges to *get back on track*. But I never lost the fact that I was serious about the whole thing. In some ways, it was a bit of a challenge, but in so many other ways it has kept me both honest and accountable... and human.

<h3>How'd I do this weekend?</h3>
Had a great weekend with the kid. She did *GREAT* at her VB tournament. I won't go into all the proud-daddy details and bore the living daylights out of you, but we had a blast.

I have really shifted over the last months in how I handle "cheating". Any more, it isn't really cheating to me. For one thing, I've really cut back on the little cheats that I used to do -- the small handful of nuts or trail mix I'd grab here and there to calm my cravings. By tightening down on the day-to-day little stuff, I find that my body responds so much better. And the cravings go way down. Then when I do cut out for a bit on the weekends, because of my natural magnetism to carbs, it has become a kind of carb backload.

That's what I did this weekend. I didn't go nuts, but I fit things into my plan. The higher cals and carbs this weekend evened my averages out. This has really been working for me: ketogenic during the week (net carbs at 40g or less), high carbs here and there during the weekend for a day or two (one day if I go way high, two if I don't). This has been bringing my daily calorie average to right around 1500 for the week. And works pretty well. This weekend I gained 0.2 lbs. Not bad. And I believe I've reset my metabolism to be receptive to the keto.

Now back to it... :D

<h3>My Big Tip this week</h3>
The biggest thing I wanted to tell all my buddies... find what works for you, whatever that may be. Be it intermittent fasting, ketogenics, Atkins, VLCD, High-carb / low fat, a more traditional diet, or even weight watcher's points. Whatever. But while you're looking for what works for you, be sure to add the "realism" component. I have found this is pivotal to success. Every long-term success story on FatSecret that I've found has this component -- Every last one. And it has been the big difference for me this time around.

CRANK ON, EVERYONE!!!

Now, I'm going to go read some of your journal entries. :D Woo hoo! I love VACATION!

204.6 lb Lost so far: 135.4 lb.    Still to go: 24.6 lb.    Diet followed reasonably well.

Diet Calendar Entry for 31 March 2014:
1273 kcal Fat: 67.17g | Prot: 100.39g | Carb: 73.38g.   Breakfast: Syntrax Nectar Latte Cappuccino Whey Protein Isolate, Konsyl Psyllium Fiber, Blue Diamond Almond Breeze Unsweetened Vanilla Milk, Universal Nutrition 100% Beef Aminos, Spring Valley Omega 3 Fish Oil, Splenda Nectresse Sweetener (Packet) (Net Carbs), Splenda No Calorie Sweetener Packets, Meijer Clear Soluble Fiber, Coffee (Brewed From Grounds), Half and Half Cream. Lunch: Steak Sauce, Worcestershire, Dinty Moore Beef Stew, Green Beans, California Mix, Half and Half Cream, Coffee (Brewed From Grounds), Splenda No Calorie Sweetener Packets, Splenda Nectresse Sweetener (Packet) (Net Carbs), Universal Nutrition 100% Beef Aminos, Marie's Creamy Italian Garlic Dressing, Mixed Salad Greens. Dinner: Konsyl Psyllium Fiber, Syntrax Nectar Twisted Cherry Whey Protein Isolate, Onion Rings, Universal Nutrition 100% Beef Aminos, Splenda Nectresse Sweetener (Packet) (Net Carbs), Splenda No Calorie Sweetener Packets, Coffee (Brewed From Grounds), Half and Half Cream. Snacks/Other: Appleton Farms Original Fully Cooked Bacon, Jif Natural Creamy Peanut Butter, Celery, David Seeds Pumpkin Seeds, Roasted Salted Cashew Nuts. more...
gaining 0.7 lb a week

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Comments 
Great post! You're so right. What works for you. Amen, brother!  
31 Mar 14 by member: mrsmole
Thank You, I really needed that reminder today!  
31 Mar 14 by member: WickedTruth
Great post indeed - I'm going to be saving this one so I can refer back to it every once in a while - you know, when I'm beating myself up LOL. Wise words indeed. Thanks for sharing. 
31 Mar 14 by member: Lynn1958
Another incredible post by Rob. I have to agree. I'm an endless tinkerer with my diet. The core remains the same - calories - but everything kind of floats around the edges. Otherwise I'm hard and fast in my approach to general diet concepts. It's important not to be afraid of food. When I was cutting, I had to take a week 'diet break' and went to maintenance calories for that week. That helped me realize that I could do it and that I wouldn't magically gain 20 pounds over a week because I'd bumped my calories up by 500. That freed me. You need to find the thing that will free you from the torment of a long term diet, whether that's a 'cheat' day that lets you have the extra carbs or a day, or a week, at maintenance calories. For me, for a while it was IF which allowed me to feel full. On my anniversary it was eating what I wanted and ignoring (but logging) the calories for that one meal, though I had really curtailed calories for the day up to that point. When you don't occasionally do these things and make a conscious decision to break out and relax about it, you do like I did with my 1400 calorie half a yogurt pie debacle. (Thanks MM for the kick in the pants.) I know that I ride people pretty hard about keeping on track here. I tend to be even harder on people who have gotten so close to their goal and I see them waffling. It's just, I'm concerned for you all because I know the payoff and I want it so desperately for all of you. I remember the last couple of months where I hit some kind of internal resistance about losing the last few pounds. I don't know what it was. Maybe it was fear of knowing my calories would be going up and wondering if I could control it. MrsMole will tell you... I was almost going nuts trying to figure out what to do. I finally did something absolutely crazy and that pushed me past the sticking point. I would never do that particular thing again (I think) because I may have lost some muscle mass over it. It's easy to get a little desperate and do something stupid. Forgive me when you feel I'm being too hard on you. I just want what I have so desperately to become part of your experience. 
31 Mar 14 by member: northernmusician
Rob, I will read this several times. Great advice! Thank you! 
31 Mar 14 by member: Deb_N
Thank you so much everyone! I'm glad you liked it! @NM, so true. I'm glad you feel so fervently about helping everyone on here. Folks like you, and your dedication to persistence have so helped me. THANK YOU! 
31 Mar 14 by member: Rob.c.weiss
@Bill, thank you. Yes, I was thinking of you a lot while writing this one. And ONE-DERLAND, here we both come! :D 
31 Mar 14 by member: Rob.c.weiss
I really appreciate your journal. A weight loss program is not a one size fits all item. Rob, I am so thrilled that you took the time to figure out what was best for you! Wishing you continued success!  
01 Apr 14 by member: BuffyBear
ROB,you are *so* cool. :D For me, *this* has been your most inspiring journal yet & *not* because you mentioned *me* as the reason for it. :D You *share so much* of yourself thru what you learn & apply & it *always* raises me up when I feel myself going down. By doing for yourself,such as in recording what you eat & weighing in regularly,it helps me to stay motivated. I am able to see & compare mine & learn from observing a success story in action!I am *moved* so much by the warm,gentle,kind & generous approach you take in all you do in the behalf of ALL OF US HERE (charts,grafts,check-ins,the list literally goes on)that I have tears slipping down my cheeks as I write. I am so *grateful* for all you do. Your efforts,recognized by you or not,has a valued impact on,I'm sure, not just *my* life & I *thank you* from the deepest depths of my heart......I just wanted you to know that. :D Great journal,Buddy :D  
02 Apr 14 by member: myawethinTICself
AWWWW. I'm blushing! :D Thanks, @Bill and @Buffy!!! And TIC, I'm so glad it helps. I know everyone on here wants personal success, but just about everyone I know also has it as a high priority to help anyone that needs it. Solicited (and unsolicited, too!) advice aplenty! Such a great place to be, our great FatSecret. THANKS AGAIN, TIC!!! 
02 Apr 14 by member: Rob.c.weiss
It's Wednesday and I almost missed out on this incredible journal because I overlooked the original post on Monday. Wow, thanks Rob once again for sharing your journey and continuing to educate us along the way. You are a true gem! This site is filled with some truly amazing people. FS is awesome. I’m printing these tips out now. Enjoy your vacation!!! 
02 Apr 14 by member: ChicaLean
As with other articles and posts I've read on FS, this too will be printed and filed in my folder filled with hints, tips, wisdom, advice and everything health and exercise in general. It's one of those things that need to be read more then this one time. To keep us mindful of our journey and goals. You're the best. Thanks Rob. 
02 Apr 14 by member: ClassicRocker
Great journal Rob. Thank you for stopping by and visiting me and commenting. Sending you a buddy request. This site is indeed filled with awesome people including you - give yourself a pat on the back too. 
02 Apr 14 by member: FullaBella
@Chica and @Kathy, thank you!!! I'm so glad you liked it. I know this has really helped me this time around. 
02 Apr 14 by member: Rob.c.weiss
Thanks @Bella!!! I mentioned it on your journal... for some reason I was thinking we were already buddies. I guess I see so many of your posts incidentally, I thought we were already connected. Hah! :D Glad to make it official. 
02 Apr 14 by member: Rob.c.weiss
LOL - I agree - I think we have that 'six degrees of separation' thing going on - know and follow the journals of so many of the people. Thank you for accepting. 
02 Apr 14 by member: FullaBella
Really good advice, Rob...coming from someone who who knows what he's talking about. Thanks. Much appreciated by so many people. 
06 Apr 14 by member: egdw
Great advice, Rob...I even shared it with a friend that has been struggling quite a bit. Thanks so much! 
10 Apr 14 by member: Jassifras
Thank you so much Rob for taking the time to write down all these inspirational messages that teach us all about the ups and downs of life as a human being. This is the first time that I have been on the FS Site and I have just been on my diet for 70 days today and I am so glad that God lead me to you and your buddies. I am going to be on here for along time to come, because I have to learn a whole new way of thinking about what I eat and if I do cheat one day, I can tell myself tomorrow is a brand new day. I was a 420 lbs. man at 6 ft. and 35 years old and after 70 days I have lost 30 lbs. I am so happy that I found good people like yourself today so that I can meet some buddies and have someone else to share with. I have just begun my journey and now I see a whole new world out their that is willing to help others. I shall do the same as I learn how to share my accomplishments with others. Thank you one again Rob for sharing your stories and wisdom with everyone. 
10 Apr 14 by member: Adam35
Wow. Thank you so much @egdw and @Jass! And @Adam, thank you as well. And welcome to FS. I hope you have a great experience here. I think you'll find the people here are inspirational and truly remarkable people. I've never met a bunch of folks anywhere that are so caring, thoughtful, and somehow always know just what to say. You're going to do GREAT! 
10 Apr 14 by member: Rob.c.weiss

     
 

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