EricaBull's Journal, 25 November 2012

I'm having a very difficult time with this. I try to have self-control, but I fail. I try to eat healthier, but I fail. I don't know what to do. I live in WA state, it rains so much here. I've talked to my dr., he says go for walks. I hate walking in the rain. It's easy to lose motivation when it's raining and being inside where it's warm is much more doable. My husband says I just need to do it. But he doesn't understand. It's not that easy. He can lose weight with no problem. He enjoys exercising, so he doesn't understand why I don't. He is not supportive. I don't know anyone here, I work full time and go to school full time. I want to cry all the time. I'm so depressed. I hate looking at myself in the mirror. I make myself sick. I suggested to my husband a pedometer for Christmas, he said that isn't going to motivate me to work out. But maybe it would. Maybe seeing how much I walk (or don't walk) would motivate me to walk. I could actually challenge myself day by day...walk a little bit more each day. I don't know what else to do.
185.6 lb Lost so far: 0 lb.    Still to go: 20.6 lb.    Diet followed reasonably well.
gaining 1.5 lb a week

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